This is inspired by a walk with one of my dogs today. She’s an adolescent Border Collie and can be a little bit jumpy sometimes with things that emerge suddenly. Being a Border Collie, she also at times has a strong tendency to react to motion, such as large vehicles passing at speed or runners.
On our walk today we had several vehicles pass us, making more noise than usual due to the remnants of snow and ice on the road. We also navigated around some large and bouncy Golden Retrievers (who stayed respectfully away from us, but she is currently not sure about large and bouncy dogs). A pigeon (birds are her absolute nemesis) flew out of a hedge no more than a couple of paces in front of us. And then a runner came past us at some speed.
The only reactions she showed was to give a startled jump at the pigeon (although to be fair, I did exactly the same) and want to follow the runner. She’s a lovely little girl, and showing every sign that, when adolescence is over, she’s going to mature into a lovely confident and well-balanced dog. Throughout each of these different things we encountered today, I was talking to her. Essentially telling her what was going on and that everything was all good.
This is something that I used to feel a bit strange about, walking along the road or path, chatting to my dog. It’s a habit I’ve had for as long as I can remember. Whenever there is something out of the ordinary, or that might bother my dogs, I talk to them about it.
A few years ago, I took a course that covered this, Family Dog Mediation developed by the ethologist Kim Brophey, discussing how talking to our dogs can be really helpful in situations where they are not quite sure. She calls it the Mr. Rogers Hack, named after an American kid’s TV presenter, known for his explanations of some quite difficult topics, all delivered in a gentle and empathetic manner.
So how can this help our dogs?
In situations where we might perhaps start to get tense about something approaching that our dogs might sometimes struggle with, keeping up a calm commentary can help us to feel relaxed, and this will aid in keeping our dogs relaxed. When the dog is on a lead there is a physical connection between us, and tension in our body can be felt by the dog. This talking to the dog about what’s in the environment can then keep us both calm.
The other thing that can happen is that we start to form patterns. Dogs like patterns, it can help them to understand what is happening and what might be about to happen and, especially in the case of nervous or anxious dogs, this can really help them to feel safe. With consistent language used the dog will come to understand what is going on.
That noise is just a lorry, and that’s fine because lorries make noise, but they go past and then go away.
The movement over there is just a bird flying out of the hedge which made us jump, but birds won’t hurt us.
The noise and shadows in the undergrowth by the other path over there is a couple of big dogs, but they are far enough away and not paying us any attention.
That fast-moving object that has just gone past us is a runner, and we don’t chase people.
All of these little observations made to our dogs can take stress out of the situations and help them to feel more relaxed and safer in their world. And, at least in my case, talking to my dog as we explore our environment together on walks adds to the shared experience; I do not walk my dogs, we go on walks together.
You can find more ways of building bonds and strengthening your relationships with your dogs in Building the Bond, available in ebook, paperback, hardcover and audiobook via Amazon or ebooks can be bought from a wide range of stores here. Physical copies can also be ordered through your favourite book store.
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